He's gone. I last saw him at 5:19 this morning when he turned and waved before heading up the escalator towards his gate. I've spoken to him twice since then by phone and did web cam with him once. But it's the not the same. It's not enough.
I am here, alone with four and half kids and a stressed out roommate. The kids are upset. And I am sinking lower than I have been in over a year. I don't want to be here. I can't do this by myself. I keep waiting to wake up and I'm just not. I swear to God, if it wouldn't leave my children so damaged, I would be gone tonight.
How am I going to get through this and be the strong one for them? I can't do this. I don't want to do this. I can't breathe. I can't think. And I'm about to give up.
Please, someone rescue me... if you can't rescue me, kill me - now.
The worst jokes I have ever written
14 years ago
2 comments:
Hang on and come hang out! Seriously would love to get to know you better - share depression stories (totally fun right :( and pass some time together. I am up for a good old fashion IM chat anytime if for nothing else than to help distract you....drop me an email.....I know we don't know each other but I have been reading your blog for awhile and who better to vent to then a stranger!
mkdsmall[at]gmail[dot]com
I'm sorry about what you're going through. Please hang in there.
sending you a hug.
Survivor
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