The SV Chronicles: Useful Information (with "Unwell" by Matchbox 20)

Did not see shrink yesterday due to snow delay for the school.

Did not see med-shrink today because he is sick.

Something is very wrong....

Here's a list I've made of Useful Information. I put the items on the list because they are a reality that doesn't match my current reality.

Useful Information:

If it isn't alive it shouldn't hold a two-way conversation with me. This includes ceiling fans, medications, televisions, mp3 players, vans. But the computer is debatable. Sometimes it is real; sometimes it is not. All two-way communications from the computer are suspect and should be taken with a grain of salt.

I have 4 children. None of them have a birthday coming up in less than one month. Do not speak to, look at, or in any way acknowledge the existence of the child who does not exist. She is not real and has never been real. Do not mention or refer to any event involving her or her part in any event involving anyone else determined to be "real". THIS IS IMPORTANT!

If it is covered in fur, it should not be talking to me. This includes cats, dogs, and pets of all kinds. They do not talk. Do not talk back to them.

Dreams are not real. Things that happen in a dream did not happen in real life. Even real events are distorted by dreams so believe nothing from a dream is real or ever happened.

I must be asleep to be dreaming. Accusing people of being just a dream is bad. Especially if I'm not asleep. If something isn't real, ignore it or treat it the same way everyone else is treating it. Verify with list if in doubt of the reality of a person or situation.

Kid-4 is fine. He is not sick. He is not dead. He has not been kidnapped. He is only crying if other people act like he is crying. He is not a baby - he is 6 years old. No one is trying to steal him from me. Social Services is not coming to take him away because he lost the neck strap to his glasses.

The mirror only says what I am actually saying out loud at the same time I see it talking. Things that can only be seen in the mirror and not when I turn around are not real, including people and shadows. The mirror itself is not alive and therefore it is not talking to me.

Marriage means consent without question. It is a promise and I never break a promise. "For better or for worse, til death do us part." Arguing about this is hurtful and wrong and unfair. Never argue about this or question it.

My MP3 player is not reading my mind to choose songs. It is on shuffle repeat which means it picks songs, probably using some variant of the Random function used in VB programming. It is not choosing songs that "fit" or to "pick on me" or to "answer questions asked in prayer" or anything else that is personal in any way. It is a crap shoot what song is played.

I went away to college briefly. I made good friends and had a good time. I did not have a roommate after the first week. There were two girls across the hall and one down the hall that I was very close with. The boyfriend of the girl down the hall was often in my room playing games on my computer. Craig hated this guy. I called home abruptly one day, in tears, and begged to come home because I was homesick. I came home the next weekend. I never returned to college.

Snow is cold. Going barefoot outside or wearing sandals should make my feet hurt. I should want a coat on. I should make sure everyone else is wearing a coat and shoes as well. They should want to do this. Snow is also not alive. Therefore it is not talking to me or being mean to me.

Baby does not hold meaningful conversations. She is a baby and while babies are alive and not covered in fur or pets, babies don't talk in words yet. So she is not talking to me. She may be crying or making sounds, but she is not talking. (And I *am* right that Baby is not MY baby - she is Baby-Mommy's baby.)

Sleep is normal and a good thing. I should not only want it but need it. Ditto for both food and drink. Get some. Use them. If I'm not, don't volunteer that information to other people. They will get upset, probably angry.

When in doubt, do what everyone else is doing. If no one is around, believe nothing, say nothing, stay calm. If people are all doing different things, say nothing and look like I know what I am doing. Whenever possible, avoid speaking out loud. This way realities don't get crossed. Then people will not get upset or uncomfortable.