The worst jokes I have ever written
14 years ago
The SV are the Silent Voices in my mind. They are my thoughts, my emotions, my memories, my voice. They are me. Sometimes I don't make a lot of sense and most people don't understand my SV. This blog is dedicated to my SV, a place free from the judgement of people who just don't get it...
"Man, that [insert drug name] makes everything in my head slow down and takes the edge off the pain in my soul. I want some."
"Yeah, that would feel good. But that isn't the way to make those kinds of pains go away. It doesn't last long and makes doing other things extremely difficult. Besides, addiction is ugly and this is a great way to start down that road. Do you really want to get hooked on something that would end up controlling you to the point that it would become more important than your kids, that would lead to being willing to lie and steal and put people and our family's lifestyle in jeopardy?"
"Bleh. Killjoy."
"I know. Get over it."
The belief that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree...